Happy.

I remember at the Rotary conference I went to a few weeks ago in Madrid, I went for a walk with my friend Alexandra. We had a bit of spare time, and instead of grouping together with some of the other exchange kids, we went for a walk by ourselves and talked. Now, I have to be honest, we were being very pessimistic at first. We complained about the kids who annoyed us, how the food sucked, and how we were mad that we were in Madrid but couldn't actually go into the city. But eventually, the topic changed and we started on life and happiness and all that other good stuff.

I've always been terrified and excited by the future. Everyone wants to be happy in life, but the question is, how do you know what decisions to make to end up happy? What road do you take? Or more simply, what will make you happy?

A lot of people would say more money. Or love. Or a great job. But then, once they have those things, they overlook them and keep putting off happiness, throwing it at a distance, and run towards it, yet never gain it. They say things like, "Once I have a husband, I'll be happy." Then when they have that they say, "Once I have a family, I'll be happy." Then they say, "When my kids grow up and I can travel, I'll be happy." Do you see my point? This leaves me wondering if happiness is more of a goal nowadays than a mindset.

This is the kind of thing Alexandra and I talked about as we were walking around. She made an excellent suggestion, and said that instead of complaining about the terrible food for one weekend, or whatever we were complaining about, we should remember that WE ARE IN SPAIN!

Then she made me list 5 things at that moment that I was happy about.

So I did. I listed the things that made me happy in that moment.I look back on that day now, and I'm so glad she made me do that, because it made me realize that I can choose to be happy when I want. Or at the very least content.

Because I've realized that content and happy are two very different things. You can choose to be content, meaning that you are okay with the things are around you and you are at peace with them. But happy, is a feeling so overwhelming and sudden and you don't know why it's there or when it came, or why it chose to come today rather than yesterday. Happiness is strong and blissful and you can't control it when it comes. But content, is a diminutive version of happiness, one you can control and know when it arrives and when it leaves, but it still leaves you satisfied.

Can you remember the last time you were truly happy? Not just content with life, but so unbelievably happy? That feeling that made you believe that nothing was impossible, the world was beautiful and mysterious, and everything was perfect?

I had one of those moments the other day. It was Saturday and Miguel and Angela took me sightseeing to the Benidorm, a beach town about 30 mins away. We first stopped to see the beaches, and even though it was raining, they were breathtaking just the same. Right on the beach were restaurants, and inside there was dancing in every single one of them, with old married couples, singles, and young people dancing and having a fantastic time.

Then, we went to walk along the promenade which was filled with shops and restaurants and heladerias. It wasn't just the food, clothes, and ice-cream that made me happy, because that did a pretty good job by itself. But it was the people, the vibrancy of the place, the liveliness that I felt there. It was crowded and loud yet peaceful at the same time. You could be in the midst of a crowd on the promenade, take a right, and end up in the old section of Benidorm, with the little cobblestoned streets.

Angela, Miguel, and I walked by a church and heard singing. I'm not even exaggerating when I tell you it was one of the most beautiful sounds I've ever heard. We walked inside and stood in the back, and the congregation were singing a beautiful Spanish song as they took their communion. I couldn't understand the words, but I could understand the meaning. There was no music, only the voices of these faithful people, but the song was strong and soft at the same time.

Then, we walked along this pier where you could see Benidorm lit up at night. It was so breathtakingly beautiful and I felt so unbelievably happy. I could see the beach, sea, buildings, and Benidorm's little island all at once. Then, right by the pier there is a walkway down to one of the beaches where the handrail is absolutely covered in locks that are put on there by couples in love. Everything about this place I loved, and I just felt that there was no place I'd rather be, with any other people than my wonderful host family.

Everything at that moment was perfect. I was so happy. Moments like that don't occur too often, when you're just hit with this wonderful bliss and feel like the world is opening up for you and offering it's most beautiful things. I know I'll remember how I was feeling that day for the rest of my life. And even though sometimes it can be hard here, it's these happiest moments that make it all worth it.